Through the Back Door
Thursday, December 23, 2004
  Coming soon to theatres everywhere
"The Art of Being Imperfect"

It shall be my first book, and it shall be grand, and oh so imperfected.
 
  turn off the radio in my head
I hang up and I don't know what to think anymore. I wonder if I'm a bother or if I come off as some ranting girl. But I don't have the anwser and this saddens me. I don't even know if you like me, maybe you hate me? Who knows and I shouldn't care.

I wonder if I'm starting to define myself by what I think you think of me. I've never done this before and it scares me. I don't want to lose what I know of me or what I think is me to some shadow of a person that I can only try to be.

Someday you might see who I really am and you might be disappointed. I'll die that day I think, I can't take disappointment from other people. I don't want to let them down.

And its quiet in here. Everyone's gone for break. And I just get to sit here and listen to silence bounce off these white walls, much like the thoughs in my head.
 
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
  you once told me...
I was one of your favorite people. I still don't know what you meant by that.


 
fumbling for the handle

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